i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
