hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
