For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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