dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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