what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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