I just saw a hot homeless man
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
