Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
