Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
