That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
