Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
