Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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