"it" just moved
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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