i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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