I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize