..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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