All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
