just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize