If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
