careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
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