Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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