Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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