Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(905): View more from Toronto

Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet

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(678): View more from Georgia

I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.

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(916): View more from California

craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(319): View more from Iowa

This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.

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(613): View more from Ontario

You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.

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(313): View more from Michigan

I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.

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