I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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