I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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