well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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