They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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