don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
