I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
