More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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