my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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