508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
