Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize