somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
