Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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