What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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