Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize