The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
