He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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