I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
