My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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