why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I think I sprained my soul last night
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
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