BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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