lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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