Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
