What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
