At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
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What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
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Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
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