PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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