btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I want a musical about memes.
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