Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
