There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize